Why did I choose this arrangement in the first place – what’s the context?
Working full-time and being a parent and a carer is hard - there is a constant care juggle and this intensifies over the longer holidays. If you are like me and don’t have family nearby who can lend a helping hand or if you have a neurodivergent child who comes back from paid care, clubs or camps emotionally dysregulated, then you will empathise with the dread the long holidays present. It’s an almost impossible puzzle, how do you make sure your children get the right care during the 12+ weeks of holiday when you are only entitled to 5 weeks of holiday a year?
Additionally, summer 2024 and 2025 will segue into major education transitions and I want to be around to support my kids and create a calm environment – not be preoccupied or stressed over work deadlines and so on.
I needed a solution that would allow me the school holidays off and to earn a regular, predictable and equalised salary across the year. Term-time working seemed like a good option offered by UKHSA which my manager signed off in support.
A decision not taken lightly
After entering different scenarios into a salary calculator provided by HR, I was able to understand how much salary I would need to sacrifice for different amounts of extra leave taken. Not only this, but there is a possible knock-on of salary reduction on things like work pension calculations to consider. Having already taken a pay cut from moving out of the private sector, it’s challenging to see your salary go down further to obtain this flexibility.
Furthermore, if I was to go to term-time working, I would need to banish unhelpful thoughts about the missed opportunities that will occur during the holidays, and what loss I might suffer. I love getting into the thick of new projects, meeting exciting new colleagues, going to interesting networking and industry events and I get FOMO. I would need to reframe this time as a chance to slow the pace down – which does not come naturally.
Connected to this is the worry about getting behind on things that should be progressed during holiday time – for instance, I am on a year-long Accelerate Leadership Scheme at the UKHSA. Could I face being 6 weeks behind and having to play catch up when I return to work in September? Again, if I chose term-time working, I would need to exercise a great deal of self-compassion and not compare myself to my Accelerate cohort.
In the end, I opted for working 40 weeks a year during term-time which covers most but not all school closures.
So how would I say it went - the elevator pitch
In general, it has gone well. Going on this arrangement has given me permission to put my caring responsibilities first. I had the mental and emotional space to focus on that and not worry about paid work during the school holidays. It has also been a welcome ‘Teams meeting detox’. There, I said it.
There hasn’t been the headache of or the arguments about juggling care and work, which is helpful for my partner who could then concentrate on his new job.
My younger child agrees it has been better for him having me around for the six weeks and we got to do some things we would have never had time to do normally like plan meals and cook them together.
The not-so-great bits
There have been downsides which some of you might recognise:
- The repetitiveness of the long holidays, which exposed my lack of pre-planning – by this I mean things like the constant cycle of meal making, the constant chivvying of children to get off devices and step out into the outdoors, and thinking of what to do that won’t cost a lot and can be accessed by public transport.
- Isolation and brain rot – there were some periods of 3-4 days when I hadn’t spent time with any adults outside my household and I wasn’t having stimulating discussions outside of what my children were interested in.
- The sheer effort it takes to emotionally regulate when you have been wound up for the 3rd or 4th time in a day and it is only lunchtime.
What has helped me
There are some which helped me to feel like I was in the loop at work but not actually working, and other things that kept my brain stimulated:
- I pre-agreed some Keeping In Touch (KIT) moments such as 121’s, team meetings and important events such as consultation meetings around the current UKHSA restructure and a listening circle about the far right riots this summer and how they affected colleagues. These were defined KITs and clear boundaries could be drawn around them.
- This one is not for everyone - I cleared emails at the halfway mark so that I would have a smaller number on my official return. It might seem like an encroachment, but I like to be able to get into work quicker.
- I enrolled on and completed an online course on the important subject of allyship. I could do this when I had spare time and at my own pace. It’s valuable learning for work and life in general. It was very timely as I decided to do it just before the first far right riots took place in Southport.
I have also made a mental note of how I can approach the long holiday next year:
- For starters, I want to plan more and ask my partner to finish his work earlier on some days so that I can have a break and go do something for myself.
- Equally, I want to plan ahead more things that involve other adults. I wasn’t organised enough to coordinate holiday timings and didn’t get into people’s diaries early enough.
Has it been a success?
I would say it has been worthwhile because it’s important to be there for those important educational transitions and the stress of juggling care is much reduced. It’s true, I’m not fully rested but I wouldn’t have been if I was juggling work and caring for 6 weeks. At the time of writing, I caught covid but think that is just bad luck!
Is this an arrangement that could work for you? If so, then why not suggest it to your employers?
Author Bio:
Lee Chan is an Insight Lead within the Behavioural Science and Insights Unit at the government agency, UK Health Security Agency (UKHSA).
She is a trustee of the Social Research Association and the EDI group lead, a contributor to the Market Research Society EDI Council and a school parent governor at a large state secondary school in Haringey, North London.
Email: [email protected]